If we were having coffee today you would see how unbalanced I am at the moment. Having contact with my mom over the previous week has given me stress and rage.
Yesterday we were supposed to meet my grandmother and grandfather for dinner to celebrate their 65 years of marriage. My uncles, aunts and cousins was there too. Sadly my grandfather was sick so he couldn’t come. And since February, when my grandmother yelled at me, me and her haven’t really been close so it was because of him I was there.
To say it was awkward is an under statement.
On top of that my mom has been the organizer through a Facebook group. And I blocked her from my Facebook several years ago when she was posting stupid comments on everything I posted, so obviously she had lots to say about me not getting the information on her Facebook group. Most of all how horrible I am that won’t add her on Facebook.
Hopefully by now your coffee is not shocking you with all the stupid drama!
I would also tell you during our coffee that the food she had ordered was horrible and not worth the money I had to pay for it. And the gift she had collected money for was for my grandmother and not for my grandfather.
I would also tell you that it was amazing to see my aunts and uncles again and my cousins and it really reminds me that I need to stay more in touch
with them. And like someone in my family said yesterday; You don’t pick your family Maria, and we understand your feelings regarding your mum, but we still love you and want you in our life no matter how you feel about your mum.
I would also tell you that some weeks ago my mom had promised my kids to go back home with them and spend some days during their fall break. So when she picked up the kids today 40 minutes late she announced that she had the flu!
To say that I got upset is an understatement again! I seriously got so upset that I had to say goodbye to the kids before they were leaving, before they were even in the car, and just go inside the house and lock the door. My nightmare is that they now and get sick during my important run up for my exams! I almost canceled the whole trip! But I saw tears in my oldest eyes so I just had to breathe and go inside with a smile.
The kids should not be let down by her again. So this will be the last time I arrange anything for her with them.
I’m so sorry our coffee is so upsetting and stressful. My life at the moment is really calm when it comes to work studies and my kids and me. And it’s very obvious to me that when I eliminate her from my life I’m peaceful.
I think by now I would be on my 3rd cup of coffee, and also starting to relax. And I would tell you that I went to the hospital on Wednesday this last week. To attack my weight problem. And I had some issues with my blood work I need to follow-up on. But nothing seriously like diabetes. Also we talked about food and surgery. But I’m not doing surgery right now, because I had lost 11 pounds.
And really I have lost them without doing much. So I’m going to see the food therapist and a food planner so we can make a plan. And if it hasn’t helped me within six months we will apply for surgery. It feels very right, like this is the right approach right now. I’m not rushing for surgery anymore, I’m also focusing more on just being healthy and not skinny.
I would think we would be on cup eight now so I would tell you how much I love the fall weather we have right now. But also how much I’m looking forward to Halloween this month because they’re having a really good event for the kids in this town. And overall life is calm, life is good.
Oh! And lastly I would tell you my English class is so much fun, but I’m struggling to get everything done with one arm, even though I’m getting better it’s going VERY slowly!! But I’m not giving up, I will just have to use a bit more time than I anticipated 😉
If we were having our 9th cup of coffee by now I would say; What about you? How is life treating you?