If we were having coffee today I would tell you how much you mean to me and that I’m grateful to have you as a friend.
I would tell you that the world feels like a very scary place right now. But on the other side it feels like I’m living in a bubble. When I see the terror in the news it feels close but still far far away. I guess it’s because I’m not traveling at the moment, and we are living in the middle of nowhere. But I guess there can be attacks here too.
But its important to me to not feel scared, because if I do let fear into my life right now it might drag me into my darkness again. The last four months has been really positive and good, So I try to stay away from everything that can change my current balance. But I would tell you that it doesn’t mean that I’m hiding from the truth, I’m just not absorbing it completely.
If we were having coffee today I would also tell you that I had two awesome weeks at my school doing my teacher practice. I learned a lot and I found out that I’m feeling much more confident this year than last year.I would also tell you that I’m struggling with my subjects for next year, because I want to be able to work and I might have to take some subjects I don’t have on my priority list just to make my schedule available for substitute teaching. It’s not subjects I don’t find important, it’s subjects I was planning to take later on in life.
But it’s OK I’m used to change and I’m used to adapt to my circumstances. The main goal is to finish my education so I can apply for a steady job and fix my financial situation once and for all.
If we were having coffee today I would tell you I was soooooo close to get out the Christmas stuff today, but I managed to stay away from it. It’s way too early. Instead I got all the kids outside and we tidied up the yard and now we are ready for snow and winter. I’m super excited about Christmas and I can’t wait to get ready to bake and decorate two weeks from now.
If we were having coffee today I would also tell you that I’ve thought about this Paris situation a lot regarding my kids. Since we don’t have the TV on in our house much they have no clue what has happened, and I am not sure what to tell or not to tell. So right now I’m not saying much. And hopefully they will be OK. Because there are so much horrible stuff going on in the world, there are terror attacks not only in Paris but many many other places too. And I just want to protect them from the horror and let them live in ignorance for as long as possible.
And earlier today I was changing my picture on Facebook to the one with the filter of the French flag. But then I realized later what about the other countries flags? Why doesn’t this happen when other countries are attacked? So I had to change it back. And then someone commented on praying, he said something about stop all the praying there’s enough religious issue going on. But I pray, not because I’m religious and believe in a God. I pray that humans will take responsible choices, I pray that humans can put love before war,I pray that we as humans can stand together for peace.
And lastly before we end our cozy coffee chat I will tell you I have faith in the human kind. I have faith in love. And it might sound childish and stupid, but I believe times will get better.
So how have you been doing, are you safe where you are in the world? Are you physically safe? Do you feel safe? My love is with you, always and forever ❤️